The other day I was scrolling through twitter, and anyone who has a twitter knows it is basically a place for people to complain let’s be honest. I do it, we all do.
Anyway I came across a tweet that was a different type of complaining. It was authored by a young girl and it read:
“I will never be good enough”
Most people would scroll right past or even, sadly, agree and retweet it on their own page.
But I found myself just starring at it.
I started to think of what things may have motivated her to write that tweet. Did a boyfriend break up with her? Did a friend stop talking to her? Did she fail a test?
And then, because the tweet reminded me, I remembered saying these same types of things just a few short years ago. This tweet made me stop and think because this was fifteen year old Cerena. And I didn’t like that.
And I thought I would share this with you all 🙂
Society is ugly. I just want to get that out of the way because there is no way around it. Girls are expected to be the skinniest, be the prettiest, do the makeup that is “on point”, buy the expensive clothes etc…
Being a girl is hard work especially with all these expectations.
And society is unforgiving if you don’t happen to meet all of them.
Because of this approval that girls are seeking from others, we learn to lose the love we used to have for ourselves.
I don’t know about you but when I was four years old, I didn’t care about how my hair looked, didn’t care that my eyelashes look longer when I use mascara, and didn’t even think twice about having a slice of cake. All I cared about was having fun.
And I loved myself.
It’s easy to love yourself when you’re so young and carefree. It’s easy to love yourself when everyone tells you you’re cute.
(This is probably why I was so full of myself as a child 🙂 )
But self-love is something that, over time, we lose.
We forget that we’re cute. We look in the mirror and see every flaw that we have been conditioned, by our environment, to point out.
We compare ourselves to celebrities, models in magazines, and even girls we have met who we think are superior to ourselves.
And this isn’t total guesswork for me, I have been there.
Fifteen year old Cerena hated herself. She thought she was fat, she thought she wasn’t pretty enough, wasn’t funny enough, wasn’t smart enough, and she needed the approval of other people to make her feel good about herself. She compared herself to other girls and wished that she looked like them.
And that logic is very flawed.
You don’t need the approval of others; you don’t need them to justify loving yourself.
You are allowed to love yourself just the way you are because you are already enough.
And it’s ironic to me because now at twenty years old, I wish I was the size that I was when I was fifteen. And yet at the time, I thought that I was fat.
Don’t compare yourself to other girls. Don’t look at the girls in a magazine and wish you looked exactly like them.
Don’t feel badly about yourself based on what other people think of you.
My goodness there is probably 1,000 valuable life lessons wrapped up within the Princess Diaries but this is one that resonates most with me and I think about it all the time.
Preach it Joe (I think that’s his name).
Isn’t that the truth though? When we don’t feel good enough for someone/something it is not them who makes us feel inferior, but ourselves. If we let what other people say or think get to us,we let them have power over us. Its silly to let another person make you feel inadequate.
Especially when we already know that we are not.
You were made by the King of Kings exactly the way you are. The God who made the very ground you’re standing on (or sitting on, I’m sitting right now) and made the sky blue also made you. As much thought, time, and effort as He put into every detail of creating the stars we see at night, He also put into making you.
I’ve mentioned this before but it just completely blows my mind that the God who created the sun, moon, and all the stars, decided that there also needed a you here too.
How could you ever say that you are not enough?
Life is too short to constantly have someone criticizing everything that makes you who you are.
I mean, you are stuck with you for the rest of your life, why not make this a friendship?
Self-love is something that most of us need to learn for ourselves once again.
And it has been my experience that this won’t be easy.
Learning to love yourself is hard especially when you’re the weird kid (me) who seems to have nothing in common with anyone around them. There were so many things I thought that I wanted to change about myself, but I quickly learned that those were the things I loved most.
It is a process.
I laugh at my own jokes. No one else may find me funny, no one else may get my humor, but I think I’m funny so I laugh.
And that’s okay.
Rarely did someone truly laugh at the things I said (at least not as hard as I did) and that discouraged me. It made me feel that I wasn’t funny enough for my friends. It made me feel like I wasn’t good enough for them, or anyone.
So even if no one is laughing, I encourage you to laugh at your own jokes. Who better to understand them than yourself?
Embrace the things that make you different. After all, who wants to be like everyone else?
Feeling not good enough also comes from rejection.
Rejection has also been hard for me to handle and rightfully so. It’s hard when you work really hard for something only to come up short. You think you did everything right but for some reason, you don’t get the starting position; don’t get the job, etc…
It’s hard and it often sends me to a dark place of such self-doubt I start to question everything about myself.
And then I let it go.
Everything happens for a reason. This is the most cliché phrase in the book of phrases, but it’s true.
Everything is meant to happen according to God’s plan and He will take care of you. Always.
When you miss out on a seemingly great opportunity, it is because God is leaving the door open for something even better to come along.
Trust in him.
If you find yourself thinking:
Am I good enough?
Or, you know, just openly tweeting about how you are not, remember this:
The little things we call “flaws” are what makes us different from other people. How boring would it be if we all looked the same?
You are already good enough. You are good enough for anyone of this earth because you are already good enough for the King of Kings. He has called you out as His own and anyone who thinks otherwise has no relevance in comparison.
I encourage you to love yourself fully and completely without feeling vain or pretentious.
It’s okay to take a fire selfie and post it (and also to think that it is fire).
It’s okay to dismiss people’s words and actions when they are trying to make you feel like you are not enough.
YOU ARE ENOUGH.
I cannot stress to you how true this is.
There is only one of you and you are important. My goodness, you are so important.
Love and Hugs,